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Dating after drug and alcohol rehab

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The advice to not date or become involved with someone intimately during early recovery is a frequent point of resistance.People involved in 12-step programs often rely on the “one-year rule” for guidance.The focus of early recovery should be laying a strong foundation for long-term sobriety and this involves searching deep within ourselves.Personal reflection and self-analysis is an important step to knowing ourselves and learning to accept and love ourselves.Of course, there are always exceptions to the rule, but assuming that we would not want our emotional and mental well-being to hinge on a miracle, is it worth the risk?

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In their minds, dating and new relationships seem benign.

When it comes to delaying gratification, when it comes to "choosing" between "one step at a time" versus "all at once," thinking in terms of gradual and taking time to develop and being objective and realistic are not how addicts are wired. Most recovering addicts don't realize that admitting to being out of control and surrendering to their powerlessness, as having done so in Steps I and II, also apply to their emotions when dating and in early stage relationships.

The problem is not the relationship or the intimacy. Sex tends to increase one's level of emotional involvement and intensity of feelings, especially for women.

Unexplained absences, a failure to return phone calls, showing up late, and explanations for behavior that don’t ring true are a just a few indications that things have gone amiss – and when something is amiss with a recovering addict or alcoholic, unfortunately there is very good reason to assume the worst.

All recovering addicts have certain triggers that could lead to relapse.