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When I showed up at the bar a few hours later, he glanced down at my thigh area situation and his face displayed a mixture of distinct surprise and disapproval. All prior images he had of me involved baseball caps and football jerseys, not the kind of wardrobe that suggested I'd show up to the bar wearing the same garment Mariah Carey did while rollerblading in her seminal 1995 music video for "Fantasy."Without meaning to, I had made a masc-worshipping guy fall for me and then catfished him.Except instead of reeling him in with the picture of a hot stranger, I had simply used a hypermasculine version of myself. In the thirst-fueled terrain of gay dating apps, few issues are fraught with more potential landmines than the topic of masculinity.For years, friendships between straight women and gay men have been a subject of pop culture fascination.Books, television shows and feature-length films have all highlighted this unique relationship, noted for its closeness and depth.Why are straight women so drawn to having gay men as friends? During the course of my research, I’ve discovered that the most interesting, compelling—and, arguably, most theoretically coherent—explanation is through the lens of evolution.Specifically, I believe evolutionary psychology and human mating can help explain why relationships between straight women and gay men tend to flourish.Alone, I blended in quite nicely with the queer mosaic of the crowd.

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But THEN, Lil Kim’s “Crush On You” came on, and this good sir bypassed all of Biggie’s part and Lil Cease’s lyrics and decided instead to passionately rap every word of Lil Kim’s verse, including the “I’ll be undressed in the bra all see through” portion. ” I turned toward him with the blankest of blank stares and asked, “What?One afternoon in 2014, a dude I'd been talking to for a few days on Ok Cupid spontaneously asked me out for a drink after work. Then I looked down and remembered that I had worn a pair of ripped jorts to work that day.And not goofy straight soccer dad jorts; these were hole-y, tight 1980s twink-in-the-West-Village jorts.Back when I was single, my Ok Cupid profile was totally #masc, which is to say that it largely consisted of photos of me downing beers, attending football games and pretending to be good at golf.There were other photos I could have used — ones in which I was sipping a Cosmo or expressing an emotion, maybe — but somehow, I knew that the ones I used instead were more likely to result in an active inbox.A few months ago, I went on a date with a gentleman who really had me scratching my head.